How to Feed a Baby

Hello Friends and Family,

Anyone who has ever been on a church youth trip knows that there is an unspoken requirement that you share a bite of two of your food from each stop at a gas station.

The best defense to this is learning how to eat things that everyone else thinks is disgusting or boring. This is why I started eating potted meat on youth trips.

No one wanted a bite of my potted meat and that was just the way I liked it. You may be wondering what this has to do with feeding a baby…I’ll get there.

Breast Feeding

For much of human history breast feeding was the only way for babies to receive nourishment. Like today there were some mothers who were unable to nurse their babies in this way.

Unlike today, however, there were no formulas available to supplement or replace breast milk. How did babies survive? Other mothers fed these babies in a practice called “wet nursing”

To our modern sensibilities this seems odd, but less than 100 years ago in much of the United States mothers who were able would help nurse the babies of mothers in their communities.

Queen Elizabeth herself created quite a stir when she became the first monarch in memory to nurse her own children. Prior to this royal babies were fed by women whose main job was to breast feed the royal babies.

And, sadly, wet nursing was a way that over 70,000 black women were used during slavery to feed the children of their masters.

As formula became more readily available the practice of wet nursing has faded, especially in developed countries. The traditional form of wet nursing, where another woman physically feeds a baby from her breast is all but non-existent in the United States.

Food Allergies

When Mills was taken to the NICU he was feed formula through a feeding tube for the first four days of his life. We were sent home with a sack full of formula and we picked up a breast pump for Courtney.

The plan was to breastfeed even with the delay from the NICU stay. We would supplement with formula until we could make the full transition. About 2 weeks into Mills’ life he wasn’t eating enough formula, much less breast milk.

We noticed he was breaking out in a rash and he was having mucous in his poop. This is a telltale sign of a dairy allergy. Our pediatrician suggested that we immediately transition to an allergy friendly formula.

There was an immediate reversal of symptoms in the next 24 hours. But, what to do about breastfeeding? This is where it gets complicated.

Whatever Courtney eats ends up in the breast milk and from an allergen standpoint we were advised that it would take a full week of her eliminating dairy from her diet for her breast milk to be safe for Mills.

How to make Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips

So we diligently made sure to eliminate dairy from her diet. We were at the finish line when we got Jimmy Johns for dinner. Courtney got a lettuce wrap with no cheese and a bag of salt and vinegar potato chips.

After dinner Courtney had a moment of motherly intuition and checked the bag of potato chips. Somehow Jimmy Johns had included dairy in the recipe for salt and vinegar potato chips.

Let’s review the expected ingredients: Potatoes, Oil, Salt, and Vinegar.

Who on earth looked at the recipe and said, “You know, these chips need a little milk.”

So, we reset the clock and for another week we waited for the dairy to pass from Courtney’s body.

Everyone in Our Family Needs Special Food

Having food allergies and the related expense is not new to our family.

Courtney has celiac disease and even owned a gluten-free baking company 10 years ago. So we are used to paying $8 for a loaf of bread that is half the size of traditional bread.

Willow has an unknown allergy, but has to eat a raw food diet that is 5x more expensive than kibble.

And now we have Mills.

Not only does Mills have a dairy allergy, we are fairly certain he has other allergies as well. Once we cleared all of the dairy from Courtney’s diet he was still breaking out in a rash from breast milk.

It became a sort of whack-a-mole game where we were going to have to eliminate so many things from Courtney’s diet that she would only be able to eat a handful of food.

So we made the very difficult decision to stop breastfeeding all together.

Nutramigen is not cheap. For a myriad of reasons we have to feed him the most expensive form of this product called “Ready to Use”. It’s $16/bottle and he goes through at least 5 bottles each week.

Breast milk is often referred to as “liquid gold”, but let me tell you the pain I feel when Mills spits up $4 worth of Nutramigen.

Potted Meat = Nutramigen

Much like Potted Meat, Nutramigen is an acquired taste. And by taste I mean smell. This stuff smells revolting. It is worse than any food smell I have ever encountered.

Imagine taking traditional kibble dog food, soaking it in water for 2-3 days, letting it sit in the sun, then draining off the water to be used as food. That’s what it smells like.

But…it is the smell of nourishment that is helping my little boy grow and thrive. Much like the potted meat I buy a couple of times a year, this smell will be nostalgic for me one day.

What is Feeding a Baby?

Everyone has a different experience, but something that seems as straightforward as “feeding a baby” is anything but.

From allergies to respiratory issues to cultural expectations around breast feeding there are so many minefields of worry, frustration, and emotions.

Our experience is not unique. We have had many friends with different challenges around feeding their babies. It is likely that you know someone in your family or friend group that also had struggles.

Feeding a baby is not “the most natural thing in the world” and it isn’t a step by step process that you follow. It is its own adventure with hidden pitfalls, costs, and intense emotions.

How to Feed a Baby

Mills woke up at 5:34am this morning (July 30, 2023). Willow followed me out of the bedroom and we made our way downstairs. I opened up the refrigerator and took out the bottle I prepared last night before bed.

I set the bottle down on the side table next to the couch and carried Mills to the changing table. After a quick diaper change Willow, Mills, and I sat on the couch.

Willow promptly went to sleep as I placed the burp cloth over my shoulder, sat a screaming Mills on my lap, and inserted the nipple of the bottle into his mouth.

But feeding Mills started almost a year ago when we decided to have a baby and committed to loving and supporting this new life no matter what.

And that’s how to feed a baby.

Until our next adventure,

Austin, Courtney, Mills, and Willow

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