Ten Things I Think I Think About Parenting After Eleven Months

Hello Friends and Family,

It is once again time for my monthly hot takes on parenting. As a reminder, each month for the first year of Mills’ life I am going to put some initial thoughts down about parenting in real time.

I might be completely wrong about some or all of these, but here’s where I am today after eleven months.

Ten Things I Think I Think About Parenting After Eleven Months

1. Take your kids on airplanes. It doesn’t matter if people get angry, they can fly private if it bothers them that much. We were all babies once and had to learn new things.

2. Everything is a fun adventure for kids. Even playing on a blanket in a hotel room. Try to look at the world through their eyes and you’ll find that more often than not, they can find adventure just about anywhere.

3. Spending time away from your kids is the best way to be a better parent. Even better, spend time away from your kids AND your significant other if you have one. Even a few hours can be a reminder that you are still your own person.

4. There are friends and then there are forever friends. No matter where you go, these friends are going to visit, check in, and generally not miss a beat. They will be there for you before kids, during kids, and after the kids have become adults. Find as many of these friends as you can.

5. Having kids does not mean the end of your life. It means getting crystal clear about the things that aren’t negotiable. I have let go several things in the last eleven months, but there are a few things that we make work no matter what.
   
   For me it is outdoor adventures and my board duties at Mars Hill University. As a family we are all in on Dad getting to do those things, Courtney has her things and Mills will one day have his.
   
   I want Mills to watch me as I do whatever it takes to participate in the things that matter, but more importantly, I want him to see me let things go that aren’t as important.

6. The more things you can do as a parent to simplify your own life the better. Just be ruthless about things that waste time or add complexity where it isn’t needed.

7. Kids need big displays from parents to clue them in on what is important. Subtlety is not rewarded. So make a HUGE deal when something is important. For Mother’s Day Courtney went to the spa in Fort Collins with a friend and Mills and I made a craft. It took over an hour to get set up, execute the craft and clean up.
   
   But you better believe I made it as big a deal as I could. Lots of kisses, lots of exaggerated hand gestures, and so many times telling him how proud I was that he was helping me celebrate his mommy.

8. Even if they won’t remember…take them anyway. I am a believer in life rhythm. Everyone’s family has a rhythm and the earlier kids can be exposed to the rhythm the better they will be at staying “on beat” so to speak.

9. Meeting the parents of the kids at daycare is like dating. There is no way around it, the cute little kids that Mills plays with everyday have parents and we are so glad they are awesome. The first hangout felt like a first date, but we are so glad we went.

10. You will have more pictures of butts and poop on your phone than you ever imagined possible. I am now immune to random pictures of poop popping up in our shared photos. You get used to it.

Mills is almost a whole year old. I’ve learned a lot in the last 12 months.

Until our next Adventure,

Austin, Courtney, Mills, and Willow

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